Not many years ago, we would have thought a person delusional if they tried talking to an electronic device. Oh, how times have changed. Today, it is quickly becoming more common to talk to our devices than physically interact with them. Voice activated devices such as Amazon Alexa, Google Assistant, Apple Siri, and Microsoft Cortana are commonplace. Even the features of our vehicles are operated by voice. Voice-activated technology is advancing at a rapid rate.
The Cambridge Dictionary defines voice-activated as the ability to “turn on or operate by the sound of your voice.” When I read this definition, it exploded in my spirit. It was like God was shouting at me, “Marriage is voice-activated too.” Your words are just as impactful to the health of your marriage as your actions. The words you speak over your marriage have the power to activate a healthy or unhealthy relationship, based on your words.
Proverbs 18:21 says, “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” Jesus said in Matthew 12:37, “By your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” Your words have the power to activate life in your marriage. They also have the power to activate death. The atmosphere of your home is voice-activated by your words.
Is your marriage struggling? If yes, then take a close look at your words. While you cannot control your spouse’s words, you have complete control over your words. Are you speaking about the problems you see? If so, you are likely voice-activating more of the same problems. If you want to shift your marriage from death to life, start speaking the solution.
How do you speak the solution? By speaking God’s Word. Jesus made it clear in John 8:32 it is the truth that sets you free. Romans 4:17 says that God is someone who, “…Gives life to the dead and calls those things which do not exist as though they did.” If you continue to speak the problem, you are speaking death over your marriage. When you speak the Word of God instead, even though what your experiencing doesn’t seem to fully align with those words, you are infusing faith and life into your marriage. You are saying, “I
choose to believe what God said is possible, even if I am not experiencing that right now.”
In 1 Corinthians 13, commonly referred to as “the Love Chapter,” the Apostle Paul outlines in verses 4-7, the qualities of love, saying, “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things…” I have shared this list with hundreds of couples. It is always an eye-opening experience. One husband responded, “Oh my gosh! That’s my report card!” He was right.
How would you grade yourself? Are you patient and kind to your spouse? Do you avoid envy and boasting? Do you steer clear of arrogance or rudeness? Or do you insist on getting your way, then act irritable and resentful when you don’t win? Do you rejoice in the truth of God’s Word? Are you willing to bear the unhealthy situations in your marriage, while believing and hoping the truth of God’s Word will turn it around?
One of my mentors, who was married over 60 years until his homegoing, spoke 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 over his wife every day, calling her patient and kind, even on those days when she wasn’t. She did the same to him. They had the most amazing marriage, largely because they were speaking the solution, rather than the circumstance. They voice-activated their marriage and reaped great rewards.
What about you? Are you willing to voice-activate your marriage? Are you willing to speak the truth of God’s Word instead of the problems? Try it, and you too will see there is life and death in the power of your tongue. Choose life!
